GriefShare offers holiday seminar, support groups for those suffering a loss
By Heather Ruenz
Staff Writer
The holidays can often be stressful, from the cold weather and treacherous roads to the hustle and bustle of shopping and financial worries.
Add to that the death of a loved one and the stress of the holidays can be overwhelming. In the initial aftermath, there are allowances in place such as bereavement leave which quite rightly, allow time off work and any other activities to grieve and heal the emotional trauma. But what do we do when it was during the holidays that it happened? A time of family and joy and laughter suddenly becomes a recurring hard-to-bear time of year – it can be very difficult to get through.
“Your holiday season won’t be easy; your emotions may ambush you and suck you under at times. But you can choose to walk through this season in a way that honors your loved one and puts you on the path of health and healing,” Deb Kasun of Elkhorn and a leader of a local, faith-based GriefShare support group, said last week.
The goal of “Surviving the Holidays,” a two-hour seminar that will be held Tuesday, Nov. 25 at Southern Lakes Evangelical Free Church, N6686 Highway 12, Elkhorn, is to offer practical, actionable strategies for making it through the holiday season.
“You’ll view a video featuring advice from people in grief who’ve faced the holidays after their loss; hear insights from respected Christian counselors, pastors and psychologists; and receive a Holiday Survival Guide with over 30 encouraging readings, helpful charts and tips to manage the holiday season during this difficult time,” Dawn Blair, of East Troy and also a GriefShare leader, said.
Linda Tump, of Whitewater, also a co-facilitator of the Elkhorn GriefShare group, said at the seminar attendees will “meet with other grieving people who have an understanding of what you’re going through. They won’t judge you or force you to share, but will accept you where you are and will offer comfort and support.”
According to GriefShare founder Steve Grissom, most people who are grieving the death of a loved one anticipate a difficult, depressing experience as they face the holidays.
“We’ve designed this material to help restore hope and optimism to Thanksgiving and Christmas, even while in the midst of the deep pain and grief,” Grissom stated in a press release about the seminar. “The information is not complicated – it consists of simple steps a person can take to make the holidays manageable and even enjoyable.”
To ensure enough materials are available, registration for the GriefShare “Surviving the Holidays” seminar is requested by Friday, Nov. 21. To register for the holiday grief seminar call Southern Lakes Evangelical Free Church at (262) 742-2366. Those unable to register are still welcome to attend though there may not be enough materials for everyone.
Connected through grief
Kasun, Blair and Tump, who all attend Southern Lakes Evangelical Free Church and have each suffered the loss of a loved one, were connected through the church’s senior pastor, Sean Sweetman.
Kasun, a pediatric homecare nurse, has experienced the loss of two of her five children – Michelle died in 1993, Joshua in 2005. She also lost her father to pancreatic cancer in 2007.
Kasun previously led a Christian support group for parents who had experienced the death of a child that served nearly 100 families over a 10-year period.
Tump, who volunteers at Sophos Community Center (run by the church,) lost her husband, Ron, five years ago. Tump participates in services at the church, loves to paint and attends art shows.
Blair’s husband, Kip, died suddenly in 2012 and she also spent a significant time with her sister, whose husband died late last year. Blair has two children, one son and one daughter, and in addition to raising them said it’s important for her to help others who have experienced loss.
The group currently meets at 6:30 p.m., Wednesdays at Sophos Community Center, 420 E. Court St. in Elkhorn and is open to new participants at any time. Kasun said they are growing and hope to at some point offer a grief group for kids.
Stephanie Rodgers, of Lake Geneva, who lost her husband, Randy, to a malignant brain tumor in 2013, said the GriefShare group in Elkhorn has been a blessing.
“I’m a single parent of a busy, teenage son now so finding a group close to home has made it possible for me to attend,” Rodgers said.
Each GriefShare program includes 13 sessions that do not need to be attended in a particular order. Rodgers, who is attending the program for the second time, admits going to the first meeting was challenging.
“The hardest part is taking that first step – opening the door and walking in. After that it gets much easier,” Rodgers said.
To find a GriefShare support group near you, visit www.griefshare.org, click on “Groups” and enter a ZIP code. On the list that appears, a click on the link under “Dates” will lead to a page with details and a contact form. The website also offers downloadable articles and helpful video clips.
Additional resources
The Compassionate Friends was established to help parents, siblings and grandparents grieving the loss of a child.
The program’s mission statement is as follows: “When a child dies, at any age, the family suffers intense pain and may feel hopeless and isolated. The Compassionate Friends provides highly personal comfort, hope and support to every family experiencing the death of a son or a daughter, a brother or a sister, or a grandchild, and helps others better assist the grieving family.”
Two Compassionate Friends meetings are held in this area:
• The Walworth County Chapter of TCF meets the fourth Monday of each month at 7:30 p.m. at St. John Lutheran Church, 104 S. Broad St. in Elkhorn. For more information contact Mary at (262) 248-4398 or jmsmarslik@yahoo.com.
• TCF Parents Caring & Sharing meets the last Tuesday of each month at 7 p.m. in the lower level of Wheaton Franciscan Healthcare, 3801 Spring St. in Racine. For more information contact Diane at (262) 895-4888 or merrittsmom@wirr.com.
For more information about The Compassionate Friends visit www.compassionatefriends.org.
